Ellie knows trauma

I don't know what the gold ball means. I just know these are both Ellie. No specific meaning goes with them.

This represents traumatic silencing to me.


I'm not sure I want to know what Ellie is remembering in this collage.


I did not know what the head gear represented initially. It is a stereotactic instrument that keeps the skull still during brain surgery. Wtf?



Ellie beginning to heal. Aside from appearing bald, she nearly always appeared naked. This ad shows her with hair...a sign of beginning to heal. Amazingly, the small print speaks of the journey of turtles. Turtles have gone with her since some of her first images. Perhaps why I now own a turtle and honor them?


This selection of collages and images are but a few of the strange and disturbing trauma remembered by Ellie. This last collage originally had a blank right bottom corner. I added the photo of her healed and looking confident...and clothed. The top images still upset me.

In my integration earlier this week, Ellie reunited with Jane who will be featured in the next post. Janie grew up to be Jane. Ellie has always appeared as an adult even though she was likely created by the time I was 3.